did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize