If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize
