I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
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