god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize