Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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