its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
