Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
