Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize