Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
The power of my boobs compel you
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
