Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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