If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
