Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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