I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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