he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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