He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
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He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
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So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.