Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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