You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
