fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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