PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize