Welp...herpes.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
