Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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