Your tits are I can't wait for
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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