another moral hangover. fuck.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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