id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
