i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize