called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
