in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
