It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
