I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
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