just tell him i said nine months
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
