Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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