so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
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I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
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She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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