if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
