Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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