And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
