You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
