Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I want to be your penis for a week.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
