I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
