Whod you bang
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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