And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
