Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
