Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
