Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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