I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Randomize
