He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
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I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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