but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
