I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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