Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
