I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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