Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
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